Denial is a normal stage of grief, but it’s usually short-lived. It’s a way to delay the intensity of emotions that accompany a loss. Denial doesn't necessarily have to mean the person is actively stating their loved one didn't actually die; it more commonly means the person is in a state of shock of numbness, and they have shut off their emotions. Continuing to live in this shut-off state can prevent the individual from making meaningful connections with others and living a healthy and productive life.
“Grieving is a necessary process that we must go through [to] psychologically, emotionally, and even biologically reorient ourselves to life without the one we have lost,” says Kara Lissy, LCSW, of A Good Place Therapy and Consulting. While the emotions associated with the grieving process are difficult, they are necessary to healing.
"At some point in a long-term relationship, each partner will have to take turns being the caretaker and the one in need of being cared for," Kara Lissy, LCSW, a psychotherapist specializing in relationships, tells Bustle. This might mean sitting in long doctor's appointments, or letting each other vent when times get tough — things that aren't always easy to do.
But, as Lissy says, these moments can create a "wonderful opportunity for intimacy and important conversations about what you and/or your partner need in order to feel cared for." And that can have a positive impact on the rest of your relationship.
"A partner who loves and respects you will be willing to make adjustments to their own schedules, forgo certain commitments to meet one of yours, and meet you halfway on big important decisions," Kara Lissy, LCSW, a NYC-based psychotherapist who specializes in relationships and attachment, tells Bustle.
Basically, they'll be willing to compromise. "The key here is that they see you as an ally in decision making rather than someone with whom they need to compete," she says. And that makes it a lot easier for them to open up and be fair.
I was honored to join Elizabeth Cohen on her fabulous podcast, “Off the Couch” recently. Tune into our conversation on the interconnected nature of spirituality and science in psychotherapy.
It was a great pleasure to film another therapy session with Lindsay for Summer House on Bravo. I'm proud of this relationship because it's an opportunity to shed light on the benefits of therapy to an audience that might not otherwise get much exposure to it. While not everyone thinks they need therapy, I strongly believe that everyone can benefit from it. I commend Lindsay for doing this important work and committing to her own personal development!
Productive assertiveness helps to quell resentment, and it also has a domino effect in strengthening relationships and harnessing inner confidence. “You’re trying to say, ‘I need to voice my complaint in a way that this person can actually receive it and make a change from it,’” says therapist Kerrie Thompson Mohr, LCSW. Basically, remove your verbal crutch of “they just doesn’t understand” from your vocabulary.
And if this doesn’t come easily to you, it’s not game over. Mohr says assertiveness isn’t an innate feature of someone’s character, and that understanding that truth is key for growth. Rather, it’s a skill anyone and everyone can learn, hone, and improve improve upon. Okay, so that’s the good news, but how do you get to the assertive promised land?
Kerrie Thompson Mohr, a licensed clinical social worker and a psychotherapist who runs A Good Place Therapy & Consulting in New York, said she would not Google a patient without prior consent and considers it to be an ethical violation. However, she has found that celebrities have needs that are different from other patients.
“We have worked with celebrities and public figures in our practice, and maintain awareness of how media affects their lives and mental health based on the information they provide to us, but we do not Google them or look them up on social media,” she said.
I asked NYC-based psychotherapist Kerrie Mohr of A Good Place, "you mentioned that it’s difficult for people to build those communities. So then what happens when we are not able to build those communities, when we’re not able to have a sense of belonging?"
Her answer: "I think it can lead to pretty profound loneliness and with you have a lot of anxiety and depression and often a vicious cycle."
Find out why on the latest episode of #Skooled featured Mohr, who is also a volunteer with Sidewalk Talk : A Community Listening Project, a global organization of therapists and volunteers who listen to people share their thoughts and problems for free. Listen here, https://audioboom.com/posts/6860316-the-loneliness-epidemic, on iTunes (https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/skooled/id1345162022…), Google Play (https://play.google.com/music/m/Du7lfekmhhmnxexzeibctcdbonm…), or your fave podcast platform.
Why do people assume women are always in bed crying after a break up? Well, because movies and TV and books tell us so.
Therapist Sonya Veytsman tells Personal Space that there are gender stereotypes when it comes to breakups, but it comes down to the level of investment, attachment, and identity that was derived from the relationship.
“It’s more about how a specific person manages emotions and is in touch with their emotions,” she says. “A guy can be as upset as a woman if he’s in touch with his emotions.”
As the number of people diagnosed with mental health issues such as depression rises to new highs, the need for medical services to treat them is growing too. Approximately 56 percent of American adults with a mental illness do not receive treatment. There's also evidence of a dire lack of treatment among teens, with the CDC reporting that the suicide rate for teens is skyrocketing.
More teens are attempting suicide. It's not clear why.
Why aren't people getting the help they need? The answer is complicated. On one hand there's the lingering stigma around mental illness that may hinder people from seeking care (a problem that campaigns like Mental Health Awareness Month aim to solve), but there's also the fact that our health care system has yet to treat mental health as comprehensively as it does physical health. There's no such thing as an insurance-covered annual mental health exam for instance, and therapists who do accept insurance are often working twice as hard just to get reimbursed by providers.
If you think you’ve got to sacrifice your values in order to make a profit, listen up! Kerrie Thompson Mohr has expanded her therapy business thoughtfully and ethically. Listen as she talks about how she decided to bring clinicians into her practice and how she balances her various roles within the business. It’s not what you usually hear. Kerrie is honest about working more right now than she plans to in the future.
Most people start the day by scrolling through their phones, getting hit with the latest political drama or tragic news before they’ve even gotten out of bed. Not good. There are more than 200 billion tweets sent each year, and the likelihood is most are putting people in an anxious or angry state that can last throughout the day — which then has a lasting effect on work, relationships and health. In fact, researchers at the Pew Research Center found that social media actually induces stress, and Twitter, specifically, was a “significant contributor” to that stress. They found that especially after reading about other people’s issues, the person scrolling felt even worse.
Sonya Veytsman, a New York City-based therapist who works at A Good Place Therapy and Consulting, chalks up those good vibes to confirmation bias, or the notion that through our current beliefs and experiences, future experiences become confirmed.
“A professional counselor will explore the thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that are occurring when you feel under stress,” says Dr. Kaplan. Workplace stress triggers might be related to your environment, your coworkers, upcoming career benchmarks, or outside influences. Here are a few of the issues you might want to work through.
1. Asking for a Raise: “We live in a society where it is generally taboo to talk about money, so it makes sense that is hard to ask for a raise,” says Julia Lawrence, LMSW, a therapist at A Good Place Psychotherapy. She suggests role-playing in therapy the conversation you plan to have with your boss.
A Good Place founder, Kerrie Thompson Mohr LCSW featured in an interview with Sacred Walker, on her Love Medicine TV show back in October.
Julia Lawrence, LMSW, For Bustle
"The main similarity between PTSD and anxiety is that the body’s alarm system is somewhat broken," Julia Lawrence, LMSW, psychotherapist at A Good Place Therapy, tells Bustle. "Yet with PTSD, the fear is often specific to a reoccurrence of an event."
For instance, if you find yourself playing an event over and over again in your head, that's a pretty good indicator that you may have PTSD and not just anxiety. "The visceral 're-experiencing' makes PTSD unique and hard to cope with," she says. "But with the right therapist, it's definitely possible to re-program that broken alarm system."
The opportunity to practice empathy and compassion on the streets through listening has been a remarkable experience for us all. Even though we listen actively as a part of our jobs daily, this unique experience has let us connect with others with the intent to be compassionate, and mindfully listen. There are no strings attached, and we seek nothing more. Join us April 28th at Astor Place
"While sleep disturbances can happen for a number of reasons, struggling to fall asleep or stay asleep and other sleep issues could be a sign of anxiety. "These symptoms are activated due to the body going into flight or fight mode (activation of the sympathetic nervous system), which is a physiological response to perceived threat," Sonya Veytsman, a psychotherapist, tells Romper by email. Not being able to sleep might mean that your body's on edge, which can indicate anxiety."
Kerrie was interviewed by a journalist for a Spanish publication, on loneliness in New York, an issue that surfaces often in the therapy room at a good place. Therapy, and initiatives like Sidewalk Talk, for which Kerrie serves as the NYC chapter Leader, can serve as therapeutic antidotes to loneliness.
"It's a city dominated by professional ambition ," says Kerrie Mohr, a social worker and therapist, in her financial district practice. "People move here to achieve their professional goals. When you prioritize your career, what you are doing is not prioritizing being with family, or friends, that kind of organic support. From what I see in my work, in New York many people are isolated in different ways because they do not have those connections . And the connections here require more effort. "
Mohr refers to the fact that social life in New York is like a job : schedules are hard, the big city, limited time, and meeting someone involves organizing a specific and good plan a few days in advance.
The team at a Good Place is committed to raising awareness about the benefits of therapy. Watch this clip to see Kerrie and cast member Lindsay in session on Bravo's Summer House, Season 2, Episode 7, as we discuss how to handle intense moments with exes that are sure to have emotions flooded! Click here to check out the episode!
“In our American mythology of hyper-individualism, we are expected to stand up on our own two feet, to compete against each other for survival. Only the weak and needy ask for help.This is a hostile environment for empathy! Empathy needs love to flourish. We need to make space for each other. We need to rebel against the mythology of hyper-individualism so we can live fulfilling and meaningful lives surrounded by people that we love and who love us.” —Kerrie Mohr, Sidewalk Talk NYC Chapter Leader
Kerrie Thompson Mohr, founder of A Good Place, has been interviewed by Bustle in an article about dating for people that are suffering from anxiety.
Until you’ve been to Japan, you have never really experienced attention to detail.
Have you ordered a humble pour-over coffee? In every simple cafe in Kyoto, the experience is astonishing: it is liquid gold.
Have you ordered a hasty tea while waiting for the train? In Kyoto station, the Matcha tea is served so elegantly and is of such exceptional quality that it graduates to the realm of an experience. read more
The opportunity to practice empathy and compassion on the streets through listening has been a remarkable experience for us all. Even though we listen actively as a part of our jobs daily, this unique experience has let us connect with others with the intent to be compassionate, and mindfully listen. There are no strings attached, and we seek nothing more. read more